My list of celebrity friends in my head is a short, yet plentiful, selection of women I admire for their actions, words, and demeanors. A few to name are Kelly Rowland, Tessa Thompson, and Taraji P. Henson. But there’s one who I was introduced to through the Queen of Media (Oprah), and that is Iyanla Vanzant. She speaks, I listen. She writes, I read. Her messages are usually worth every bit of attention. One in particular stuck out and made me think for a while. The article’s title read:
4 Signs You’re Settling for Less Than You Deserve
Are you giving yourself everything you desire because you do not have the faith in yourself, in life, in the importance of what you want? Truth is, we all settle in some kind of way.
We are programmed to believe that what we have is good enough because at least it isn’t nothing. You see settling all of the time in various forms: accepting poor behavior in relationships because the thought of being without that comfort is too much to bear, being OK with jobs rather than careers, burying dreams because that’s not what gets the bills paid, etc.
When did good enough equate to happiness and excellence?
Here are some of the points from the article that we all have experienced while embracing the “this is okay” idea:
- When you have to work yourself into a state of excitement rather than naturally experiencing joy and passion.
- When you bargain with yourself about what you can do without, rather than feeling gratitude for what you already have.
- When you’re making excuses about why you should stay put rather than going for what you truly want.
- When you spend more time complaining about what you have than appreciating it.
Everyone has the option to design and live the most fruitful life. I stand firm in that belief. You probably did not need this post or Iyanla’s article to tell you what you’re possibly settling for in certain situations. It reflects in our deepest wishes. Own your truth and know that those wishes can come true.